Ode Du Fish Sauce
Oh fish sauce, how I feel for thee.
You are a wonderous and tasty addition to my bland rice vermicelli.
So simple, yet so fine.
Why do people scorn you so when brought to the table?
They hear your name and are immediately turned off.
I beg and plead for your case yet people always just turn their heads in disgust!
"Oh, no fish sauce for me!" they say.
And I retort "Why not? It surely will add a taste sensation that can be claimed as next to Godliness!"
Oh fish sauce, why do people judge you so?
They are prejudice to your name because it contains the word fish.
They judge because they assume your nothing but ground up and blended bits of dolphin.
They always judge a book by its cover.
Oh fish sauce... What the hell do "they" know anyways.
Nobody ever takes into consideration that you may just be a tasty addition to a meal.
Why should they? They think your made of fish!
Little do they know that I have your secret.
I have always been a promoter for your luxurious taste.
But people still turn up their noses when they hear your name.
Why don't they get it? Really, what the hell is their problem?
Why don't people believe me when I say your just a tasty oily sauce that has no fish in it?
Perhaps I won't tell them anymore.
Perhaps I won't fight for your tasty cause.
Perhaps... Perhaps... Perhaps...
I could perhaps all day and it won't get you or I anywhere but nowhere.
We could change your name to something like "oily goodness"
Or we could change it to something more elegant like "bonté huileuse" which is just French for "oily goodness".
Who would ever know but you and I?
Nobody would second guess you with a name like that. Not even the French because they eat worse crap than that anyway!
No... No...
A name change will not suffice.
What the hell do you or I care what anyone thinks about our dirty little relationship?
None! None I say.
Forget the masses, forget them all!
People can judge all they want now fish sauce!
They will continue to have a prejudice to you.
My words will no longer fall on deft ears.
As I shall no longer fight with losers who don't take my word.
Oh fish sauce, my fish sauce.
You shall continue to flavor my vermicelli.
You shall continue to fill my heart with delight.
I shall fight no more...
Oh fish sauce, don't ever change old friend.
I will not share your secret anymore, and this I promise.
Oh fish sauce, just know that I have forsaken you not.
And even though I speak not your name, I will never forget you...
You are a wonderous and tasty addition to my bland rice vermicelli.
So simple, yet so fine.
Why do people scorn you so when brought to the table?
They hear your name and are immediately turned off.
I beg and plead for your case yet people always just turn their heads in disgust!
"Oh, no fish sauce for me!" they say.
And I retort "Why not? It surely will add a taste sensation that can be claimed as next to Godliness!"
Oh fish sauce, why do people judge you so?
They are prejudice to your name because it contains the word fish.
They judge because they assume your nothing but ground up and blended bits of dolphin.
They always judge a book by its cover.
Oh fish sauce... What the hell do "they" know anyways.
Nobody ever takes into consideration that you may just be a tasty addition to a meal.
Why should they? They think your made of fish!
Little do they know that I have your secret.
I have always been a promoter for your luxurious taste.
But people still turn up their noses when they hear your name.
Why don't they get it? Really, what the hell is their problem?
Why don't people believe me when I say your just a tasty oily sauce that has no fish in it?
Perhaps I won't tell them anymore.
Perhaps I won't fight for your tasty cause.
Perhaps... Perhaps... Perhaps...
I could perhaps all day and it won't get you or I anywhere but nowhere.
We could change your name to something like "oily goodness"
Or we could change it to something more elegant like "bonté huileuse" which is just French for "oily goodness".
Who would ever know but you and I?
Nobody would second guess you with a name like that. Not even the French because they eat worse crap than that anyway!
No... No...
A name change will not suffice.
What the hell do you or I care what anyone thinks about our dirty little relationship?
None! None I say.
Forget the masses, forget them all!
People can judge all they want now fish sauce!
They will continue to have a prejudice to you.
My words will no longer fall on deft ears.
As I shall no longer fight with losers who don't take my word.
Oh fish sauce, my fish sauce.
You shall continue to flavor my vermicelli.
You shall continue to fill my heart with delight.
I shall fight no more...
Oh fish sauce, don't ever change old friend.
I will not share your secret anymore, and this I promise.
Oh fish sauce, just know that I have forsaken you not.
And even though I speak not your name, I will never forget you...
Disclaimer:
Fish sauce actually does contain fish...
posted by b0rt @ 11:53 PM
12 comments
12 Comments:
So, I have no clue why I continue to comment, when I really have no idea what to say. I will say you are very original and creative.
"A new fantastic but odd story on me blog"...thanks...I would have been surprised without the heads up!
Thanks Denise. I was out with Roseanna last night and I came up with the idea to write it. I thought it was funny, but then again I wrote it at 1AM and was friggen tired. Looking at it again today I'd change a few things, but I won't. See you on Monday!
I actually really enjoy fish sauce. I think you may just need a different set of dining companions.
However, very good entry, quite enjoyable. I am fully sated on b0rt for the day.
Your friendly neighborhood judge helene
Nice blog. I saw a Food Network show on how they make fish sauce, which didn't sound very appetizing. However, it is pretty tasty stuff!
Peace,
Brian
'Shut up you're dumb!'
-as per normal Bort I am left with a sense of - what is your deeper meaning?
C-ya in an hour or so.
OK ..OK .. I got it.
I see you sitting on a rock. You're somewhere in the holy land on one of those famous "mounts" with possibly an olive tree in the distance. Your wearing a toga. With mandolin in hand you strum away beginning your new folk song "ode du fish sauce". (unfortunately you must effect a British accent.)
hmmm .. indeed I know that fish sauce is tasty and exceedingly pungent .. but would you call me foolhardy if I gave myself footbaths using tepid fish sauce??
please talk to me Jason .. I'm scared .. I think I am going through something that I don't understand! .. would you call me fish feet?!? -- today I combed my hair with a fishbone just like Fred Flintstone .. OH decadence!
https://business.accesscomm.ca/jpfexperiment
sorry
http://business.accesscomm.ca/jpfexperiment
you should be sorry! you and those who bore you.
Oh sweetie, I will love you through all of your present and future mental breakdowns.....you're a silly ass. Incidentally I hate fish sauce, it reeks.
Auntie Tita
Ok... why has no one commented on the fact that b0rt claims there's no fish in the sauce but then later throws in a "convenient" disclaimer that overturns this previous statement?
Oh and Dolphins aren't fish you silly little man. They're mammals:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dolphin
I'm saddened that people continue to stroke your ego when you so frequently are the proponent of false informaiton.
Entertaining nontheless
-BR
Hemi. You should know by now that I obviously threw the dolphin comment in there to see who would pick up on it. Obviously you were the first. For that, heres a cookie.
I think I should get into politics...
Well, what can I say about my brother? Besides the fact that he's uber weird, he's also uber creative. I am one of those people who turn away the fish sauce, as I hate anything seafood!
Let me just say, the amount of comments written in the short amount of time since the blog posting is most impressive. You must take that as a sign to write more blogs more often...it's been too long in between!
As for Hemi, if you read this (which you might already know) there is also such thing as a dolphin fish, otherwise known as "Mahi-Mahi"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dolphin_fish
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